At the beginning of the week I didn’t anticipate having any funerals to attend, then suddenly I had two to choose from. Two women, both far too young, each lost their battles with ongoing illnesses. First I found out about Steph. I hadn’t seen her in years. And I’d known her older brother better than I’d known her. But I was shocked and saddened to hear she’d passed away - from ovarian cancer at the age of 30. Less than twelve hours after hearing that news I found out that my aunt had also passed away. On the same day as Steph. Sue was 49. Unfortunately I didn’t know her well. But in her I’d always sensed a great kindness, and a great sadness. I attended her funeral this morning with my father. It was unbearably sad. I know, most funerals are, but I’ve been to too many and this one, well, there are no words. I think it’s always harder to see parents outliving their children…
Speaking of which, next month there will be a private memorial service for Felix. The hospital has arranged for a number of families, who experienced similar tragedies, to acknowledge our losses together. My first reaction was a resounding hell no! But after thinking about it I realized…this is something I need. To acknowledge the lost future of my son, Felix.
Thankfully the weekend promises better and brighter shiny happy things. I can’t wait to see Maria. She’s in town from Berkeley. Tomorrow night we will play games and goof off and laugh and all will be glad.
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