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Twitching Myself Sideways

High Fives for the day after (out late last night, with too little sleep).

Photos are up from The Retribution Gospel Choir / Kid Dakota / The Chambermaids show. Last night was lovely and worth the sleep deprivation. Sometimes I just have to be on the rock clock.

Rett's Dunny

Bonus: This would definitely make it on a low fives list. It’s a bad day for history nerds. The city without a memory: treasures lost under collapsed Cologne archives. Like a modern day Library of Alexandria. Such a great loss.
Plus: Here I was thinking Saturday would be my quiet day/night this weekend, but I’d forgotten about two events. One, the Make it Pretty Please art opening at Rosalux Gallery. And two, Bears vs. Ponies! A reunion of sorts of the goth and punk kids who went to WBL and Stillwater high schools in the late 80s/early 90s. Not sure if I can swing that, but I want to.
And: Sheela has returned from her romp through New Orleans and is back to the ovens. This week in cupcakes! Mmmm, blackberry lime is sounding fine.

All Teeth and Turpitude

My love of A. Lee Martinez continues with eager anticipation of his next book. As soon as my state tax refund arrived I pre-ordered Monster. How could I resist with a cover like that - a devilish skull and crossbones surrounded by the words “cryptobiological contaminant and rescue services” - it got me hook, line and sinker. Now for the blurb about the book:

Meet Monster. Meet Judy. Two humans who don’t like each other much, but together must fight dragons, fire-breathing felines, trolls, Inuit walrus dogs, and a crazy cat lady - for the future of the universe.

Monster runs a pest control agency. He’s overworked and has domestic troubles - like having the girlfriend from hell.

Judy works the night shift at the local Food Plus Mart. Not the most glamorous life, but Judy is happy. No one bothers her and if she has to spell things out for the night-manager every now and again, so be it.

But when Judy finds a Yeti in the freezer aisle eating all the Rocky Road, her life collides with Monster’s in a rather alarming fashion. Because Monster doesn’t catch raccoons; he catches the things that go bump in the night. Things like ogres, trolls, and dragons.

Oh, and his girlfriend from Hell? She actually is from Hell.

In other paranormal news, a co-worker pointed out an animated French show that I would most certainly enjoy, with opening credits by The Cure. Now I’ll have to see about getting a hold of some episodes of Chasseurs de dragons (Dragon Hunters).

stuffing his beard into his mouth

Bonus: I’m actually getting to some shows this week! HOORAY! Tonight my lovely mop-topped friends The Chambermaids are opening for Retribution Gospel Choir at the Triple Rock. Friday night it’s The Chambermaids, again, with Seawhores and The Blind Shake at Eclipse Records. I’ve also got guest spots (thank you Radio K) for the Gay Witch Abortion / Skoal Kodiak show later on in the Entry. Have to see if I can make that happen.
Plus: In other music news…Do You Realize? by The Flaming Lips has been named the official song of Oklahoma. Awesome. But I’m waiting for more Lips related announcements…specifically the full line up for ATP NY 2009 (curated by The Flaming Lips) so I can decide whether or not to squirrel away some money for a return trip to Kutsher’s in September.
And: The new P.O.S. is receiving rave reviews, as well it should. But I particularly love his shout out in Optimist to broken crow, whose artwork is featured in the video - and will hopefully appear on the side of my house sometime this summer.

The Resultant Fizz and Seethe

Recently my friend Adam and I were egging each other on in the redesign of our photography portfolios. Good for us! Except he beat me to the punch by finding a clean, simple WordPress portfolio before I did. What I found is more of a photoblogging theme than a portfolio one. And it works for me. Yes, this means I have another blog baby to manage. But I promise not to neglect this one. I will love my blogs equally. So I give you sharynshoots.com, still in its infancy. I am open to feedback but please, go easy on the little darling.

Adam and the other Dan

Bonus: Back when I had more money - thanks to home equity loans rather than actual earned income - I splurged on season tickets at the Children’s Theatre. The little man has always loved live theater. But our last pair of tickets will be for the production of Iqbal. A light-hearted romp about…child labor. Sure, it’s garnering great reviews, but I worry that it might go over the boy’s head. Guess we’ll see.
Plus: This year’s Red Hot Art Festival is coming! And I’m thinking of filling out an artist’s application. Hmmm.
And: My friend Chuck took a stunning photo yesterday, of a beautiful Eastern Screech Owl hanging out just outside of the Minneapolis Institute of Arts.

My Mind’s Mercurial Decisions

I need to daydream, to look ahead, because the right now kinda sucks. The little man does seem to be recovering from his sickness. Though he’s only eaten one piece of toast in the last 30+ hours (which he kept down). I’ve been feeling a bit off myself. This morning my lethargic boy was laying in bed with me, listening to Low’s Songs for a Dead Pilot, which probably didn’t help much. But the song Hey Chicago got me thinking. The boy’s spring break is right around the corner. This year I can’t afford any intercontinental or cross-country adventures, as I have in the past, but a Midwestern road trip might be manageable. We could kick things off in and around Madison, WI. After all these years I have yet to visit the House on the Rock. Then we could forge onward to the windy city. We have friends we could stay with but I’d hate to impose. Instead I might try to nab a good hotel deal online. And hit up some old favorite spots like the Chicago Diner, Atomix Coffee, Rotofugi Toys and Vigilante Press. And new hotspots like Chickpea (which I’ve heard nothing but great things about) and Bleeding Heart Bakery’s new location.

Quick poll: what are your favorite travel deal sites? Priceline, hotwire, kayak? Or how about travel deal sites to avoid?

curtains

Bonus: In a 30 second spot, the Coen Brothers spoof clean coal for The Reality Coalition.
Plus: Apparently Minnesota is now home to an all-male roller derby league, The Twin Cities Terrors.
And: Jon Gordon is suffering from twitter fatigue so extreme he has called for a Tweet-out this Friday, March 6th. I can go a day without tweeting. Just you wait!

How I Learned That Everyone Is Against Me

I’m on the tail end (I hope) of one of the most awful weekends I’ve had in some time. And that’s saying something. Friday evening plans fell through. Saturday I hauled the boy out to the burbs to celebrate a classmate’s birthday. Thought I’d pop by Mitrebox on the way to pick up a treat for him but I failed to call ahead. When we arrived the vegan cupcakes were all gone. We left empty handed and disappointed then managed to get lost along the way, causing us to arrive a half hour late to the party. In an indoor playground that was jam packed with screeching children. My nerves were shot by the end of the ordeal but I managed to run some errands on the way home. Once home we didn’t leave again. Early this morning I was woken by some asshat who had pulled into the neighbor’s driveway, honking their horn repeatedly. Who honks at 6am on a Sunday? This also woke the lad who, I was dismayed to discover, was feverish and incredibly ill. Been spending the day trying to make him as comfortable as possible. And realizing that maybe we should have skipped the blueberry pancakes (after he hurled them back up). Lack of social contact with other adults isn’t helping my mental state. Some close friends are out of town. Others are entertaining parents who are in town. But I’m still feeling frustrated and pitiful and alone and desperately trying to snap out of it.

Five good things:

I stole this post’s title from the new How I Learned Reading Series happening every fourth Wednesday in NYC.

Blaise K brings a new monthly How I Learned series to town, “featuring the best writers, comedians, bloggers, performers, and personalities [it] offers such educational topics as How I Learned About Sex, How I Learned That Everyone Is Against Me, How I Learned My Adolescence Is Over, How I Learned That It’s Not All My Parent’s Fault (Only About 75 Percent), How I Learned We Were Breaking Up, and more. How I Learned strives to share invaluable life lessons against a dimly-lit, self-indulgent, sexually tense and potentially booze-fueled backdrop. It’s education that works.” Tonight’s debut features Mike Albo, Todd Levin, Rosie Schaap and Erin Bradley on the topic How I Learned to Steal From the Liquor Cabinet: Stories About Drinking (…Or Not Drinking).

Sounds like my sort of thing at my kind of place. The hosting venue, Happy Ending Lounge, was an erotic massage parlor in a former life but has since been transformed into a posh two floor club. Next time I’m in NYC I’ll have to drop by - there, the Brooklyn Superhero Supply Co and to one or both Red Bamboo locations.

I'm missing this man

Unattached In Time

We survived snowmageddon today but it wasn’t pretty. Well, all right, the snow itself is pretty but the long slog home sure wasn’t. Especially the parts that had me cursing like a sailor (and being reprimanded for it by my nine year old son). I’m just not a big fan of two-hour white-knuckle commutes. Quite relieved that dear Adam’s birthday was pre-storm. Last night we celebrated with dinner and drinks (and dry roads) at Jasmine 26. And I spent a chunk of today listening to the birthday mix I made for Adam last night.

I was remiss in my earlier weekend roundup:

  • My good friend David is now playing with France Has the Bomb. Tomorrow night is their 7″ release show at the Hexagon, with Box Elders (Omaha), Leisure Birds, and Real Numbers. Unfortunately I don’t think I can scare up a sitter. And I might not even leave the house tomorrow, thanks to the snowpocalypse. But this threat from a more senior member of the band makes me not want to miss it: “As part of his rookie hazing, David will be wearing pleated slacks.”
  • Saturday night there are two earlier, fairly kid-friendly events happening but which one to attend? Closer to home it’s the MN Rollergirls Circus of the Scars bout. But that’s not free. Further away but free is my friends’ band, Ghostface Cow, playing at the Stevens Square Center for the Arts for the Minimum Wage: 40 Paintings by Lizardman exhibit.

The little man doesn’t have school on Fridays and I’ll be paying for childcare tomorrow no matter what, but I might just stay home anyhow to avoid the 15 mile trek. The thought of hunkering down, baking, building forts, working from home and watching movies is most appealing. But then I’ll really have no excuse not to shovel.

Rett, enjoying ET

Bonus: Universal remotes have been around for a while now but I need a similar such gadget, for keyless entry key fobs. I have one fob for my car, one for my home security system and another to let me into my office building (and for a time last year my son’s school offered key fobs to parents too, but they have a spiffy new intercom system now). Three key fobs on my already swollen key chain is too much.
Plus: The comment spammers seem to be working double time lately. Any other WP users getting hit hard? I may need to tweak Akismet.
And: Wow, David Bowie sticking it to the man at the age of 17 (with the society for the prevention of cruelty to long-haired men).

Old Enough to Know Better

Yesterday I did a grown up thing and had my taxes done. When I found out how much my refund would be my brain did back flips and considered some not-so-grown-up expenditures. Like splurging on more camera gear, or flying myself to the ATP festival in England (they’ve redesigned their site, btw) or at least to ATP in New York in September. But this isn’t la la land. In reality I’ll be chucking half the refund into my currently depleted health savings account and using the other half for living expenses. And so it goes.

Speaking of money I can’t part with…tickets went on sale today for the Leonard Cohen show in Minneapolis, if you have the presale password, which I do. I’ll have to make due with this interview in the New York Times.

Other local type news:

  • I tweeted about this the other day, but Brasa is opening a Grand Avenue location in mid-May! This article mentions the expansion of their menu at the new hotspot. Fingers crossed that it’ll include more vegan options as well. Though the current options at the Minneapolis location are fabulous.
  • That was the same day I found out about a new local foodie blog: “The Heavy Table is a Twin Cities-based magazine passionately telling the stories of food and drink — from roots to table — in the Upper Midwest.” Now to come up with my theoretical dream restaurant for their contest
  • I had toyed with the idea of driving to Chicago this weekend but lack of funds is making that a no-go. Consolation prize? The Bee Tour Studio Opening party thingie this Friday, the 27th.
  • This week in cupcakes!

If you are a person who has been somehow significant to me in some way, chances are your birthday is this week. Not in all cases, mind you, but maybe 1 in 4. Or so it would seem. Today’s birthday buddies? Adam and Pete. Happy Birthday you two!

Sheela, so proud of her handiwork

Bonus: Mr. Darcy’s brains taste foul in my undead mouth. I’ve only just found out about this: “Pride and Prejudice and Zombies features the original text of Jane Austen’s beloved novel with all-new scenes of bone-crunching zombie action.” Genius! (via Kate Beaton)
Plus: A roundup of three very different photographers. The work of Charles Negre, the night photography of The White Elephant and local photography of Minnesotan Tom Arndt.
And: Neil Gaiman, Dead But Still Twittering? And Giyen is always so damned entertaining.

A Constellation of Moments

I nailed that last item on my Saturday To Do list. I did, in fact, stay out ALL NIGHT LONG. Finally went to bed at 5am this morning. The rest of the mind-numbing entertainment coma wasn’t entirely to plan. Skipped the gym, didn’t go to a movie or to the art openings, but did spend my afternoon running errands, catching up with some lovely friends at Caffetto, and hanging out with my tight bros Adam and Carolyn. The three of us went to another friend’s birthday party where even my peculiar needs were catered to (in the form of mocktails and tofu dogs).

Afterward I’d intended to head to the Turf Club. Thanks to the glory of twitter I discovered my friends’ band went on earlier than I’d thought and I missed their set. Doh. So I stayed in Minneapolis - where we rounded up some other friends to head to the Triple Rock. While doing so I caught part of a Japanese movie that seemed custom made for me. I give you The Calamari Wrestler:

Okay, admittedly the films of Minoru Kawasaki aren’t for everyone. The man is as goofy as they come, and seems to have a penchant for dropping animal-suited people into movies of various serious genres. The formula works, and for the most part the humor comes more from the absurdity of the situation than from the actual script. The Calamari Wresler is probably the most straight-forward example of Kawasaki’s style—a pro wrestler comes back to life as a squid to reclaim his former life—and although this brand of schlock isn’t really equipped to hold up to any sort of serious scrutiny, it is a really goofy and fun way to spend 90 minutes.

I need to watch it in its entirety. Thankfully it is available via Netflix. And the official site, in Japanese, is entertaining in its own right. Maybe a little more so than The Talkers’ (allegedly) last show. Hanging out was great, especially when the topic of tazer bears came up, but The Talkers actual set was a bit odd and ended early. It was well before bar close so we high-tailed it over to the Hexagon to catch Cheer Accident. And in the hour we were there one member of our group had some particularly strange encounters involving auras of rainbow knives, and being mistaken for a member of Coldplay. All of these oddities added up to an extremely fun day and night.

After less than four hours of shuteye I returned to the wonderful world of sleep-deprived parenting. It’s been a day of struggling to get things done balanced with copious amounts of napping/zoning out and letting the lad do too much of whatever he wants. But that has included lots of drawing and planning his Halloween costume. That plan focuses on facial hair. It’s his latest fixation. He wants to have a beard and/or mustache when he grows up. We’ll have to go faux for this Halloween (but who knows, maybe he’ll have some scruff by next year - *shudder*) so he can dress up as obscure Italian cartoon character Dante Vale from Huntik. I set a bad precedent, letting him select my costume each year, so I wonder which seeker sidekick I’ll get stuck impersonating.

Get Bent!

Bonus: Leonard Cohen kicked off his tour in NYC and will be in Minneapolis on May 3rd. Unfortunately the ticket prices are steep, with the cheap seats starting at $78.
Plus: Friday night was busy fun as well. We used Punch Pizza’s 2-for-1 coupons followed by a small pillow fight/Wii party at our house.
And: The Coraline book cover, re-imagined in a stunning retro style. And from Geeks of Doom, 9 Of The Most Entertaining Cameos In Movie History.

A Constant Mind-Numbing Entertainment Coma

This Saturday my son has his monthly overnight with my awesome ex, which is great, but they’re starting the party early. A little after lunch. Which leaves me about 24 hours free from active parenting duty. 24 hours I’m not entirely prepared for. In fact, I had been looking forward to seeing the animated Azur & Asmar with the boy. But that can wait. Instead I have a loose itinerary - with a focus on maximizing the fun while minimizing any spending. I am open to suggestions so fire away!

Saturday I may or may not:

  • Grab cupcakes at Mitrebox, if there are any left at that point in the afternoon.
  • Work out at the Y.
  • Finally redeem my gift card at West Photo.
  • Curl up with a good book and/or catch up on teevee via the internet.
  • Have dinner at home or enjoy an afforable dinner out.
  • See a PG-13 or R rated movie! But which one?
  • Attend a friend’s birthday party.
  • Swing by an art opening at the Soap Factory and/or the Bird x Bird Exhibition at the Northrup King Building.
  • See friends’ bands play at the Turf Club.
  • Haul ass over to the Triple Rock afterward, to see more friends’ bands.
  • Stay out ALL NIGHT LONG.
me, warming up in the car

Bonus: Seems like lots of us are thinking Spring, even though it’s a little ways off yet. But how awesome would Lawn Scrabble be? Sadly my backyard has a huge slope so I’d have to use my flatter front yard for this. And then I’d just be yelling at the neighbor kids to get off my damned lawn. Sigh.
Plus: This Mental and Physical Glasnost t-shirt has tickled my fancy.
And: My Kate Beaton crush continues, even if she is going to corrupt us all.

Breathing Fumes and Having Visions

We’ve made it to mid-week. Congratulations! Unfortunately my brain is unable to arrange information in anything other than bullet points.

Can you tell how very exhausted I am? Time to shut down for the evening. And maybe finish watching The Host via Netflix Instant.

pretty accident